Something very interesting happened today. Since I've been rejected by my lover for a couple weeks now, I was getting very frustrated. And I'm a 31 year old sexual girl! I want to have sex! Sometimes my ovaries actually HURT because I need to have sex. And sometimes I am so stressed it releases all the tension.I have to remind muffin man I am not a 40 something year old soccer mom who doesn't care about sex!
So needless to say I've been practically begging him to come over and fuck me and he keeps declining. I told him I have other options and if he wants to push me away, then fine. I gave him a last chance and he rejected it.
So... A friend of mine whom I had been sleeping with for months at a time over the last few years is celebrating his birthday. For the last year he has been asking me to meet him on lunch break for a quickie. I denied him every time because I am in love with mm and don't want anyone else touching me. Until today. The plan was I meet him on lunch break. He was gonna do something mm NEVER does which is go down on me! if we did tit for tat, he owes me like 100 times! Not that he's that selfish of a lover he claims he doesn't like to do it. It makes me feel unattractive to say the least but I think he has no idea what to do! I mean how dare him?
Anyway... As I woke up this morning, I thought, oh god I don't wanna be with him! I don't want anyone right now other than the love of my life. I actually prayed to god this morning and said "god, please give me a way out of this. Send him far away on jobs where he has no time to get back my way. You promised you'd make a way of escape if we need one so please do this for me."
So I dressed pretty damn sexy for the office. I got stared at by EVERYONE. Very uncomfortable! I sent the bday boy probably about 5-6 text messages and because I needed to plan a lunch break. And I never got a single response! Not one! I have no idea what happened nor do I really care but wow. Very interesting. And when I saw my mm today I go tears in my eyes when I saw the love he has for me in his eyes. I told him today, "oh my god I love you so much I wish I could make it stop!"
I just can't turn this shit off!!
Now I'm all dressed sexy for no one. The mm had meetings all day out of the office. Such is life.
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2 comments:
Maybe you're secretly relieved that the lunch date didn't work out. Not that i fault you at all for trying to make at leas a little break with MM. You have needs, physical and emotional. The emotional one are the hardest to satisfy.
Secretia
Go for it and see the other guy!! What have you got to lose?
MM doesn't seem to want to give you what you want right now.
Life is too short to wait for something that is not going to happen.
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