Now in regard to the comments I received, I can't comment back from my phone so here are my comments.
EG-that suuuucks you only got to see him for a weekend! Did u block it out of your mind and enjoy the fantasy of you two together? You waited so long. Its gotta hurt so badly. I'm sorry
SA- you told him enough huh? What was his response? If any? Horrible that he could be with you for four years and never progress any further whether it be with words or actions.
Spring Flower: "Some lovers can't spend dinner or overnight because of their home situation. It's part of the game. It should be fun, not a cause for worries or mind games." True... But....This is not a game though. This is a full fledged relationship. He and I never thought it would turn into such a loving relationship. And I am now having fun. I haven't cried in a while!
J-"I can go out in the evenings sometimes because I have a hobby that permits that. And if I did not have a hobby like that, I would have taken one up in order to carve out that time." Um he has a hobby. But he still said to me the other night that its getting harder and harder for him to see me. That sounds to me like this is going to end soon. What do you think?
And basically after reading everyones comments I think I have it pretty good for being with a married man. He tries really hard to make me happy. And I am. I'm in love. And it gets better and better every day!
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4 comments:
EG and I discussed "stuff" at dinner of our last night so it dampered the evening, but the next morning he woke me up deliciously showing me what he feels for me and then again later that morning. I was able to block it out, but now that I know, I knew I wasn't crazy when I started realizing a creeping distance coming between us in last month or two. How does he separate the two without me feeling neglected? I have a lot of questions, that we didn't discuss and I plan to soon. We will see. I'm definitely hurting right now. It's different this time than after our other visits somehow. Once again I feel like I'm being punished for decisions I made years ago when I didn't see where this relationship would go. Although meeting years later and building the relationship we have now has been fantastic. I would not change things. My heart is just so heavy right now.
Ending soon? No idea. I know that my ability to get out varies. For example, my plan for this weekend was to get a hotel room Friday night for a few hours with A, then go home and meet her back in the room for breakfast and dessert. But my excuse for being out Saturday morning is an outdoor activity, and now it looks like it will be raining. So you see, sometimes it is just harder.
Thank you for checking up on me!! i am sooo happy with your recent posts- that things are looking up! Love your blog.
As for me.. well we are meeting up for a chat in two weeks. The delay is due to my going away for work. We are meeting after work and I'm just going to lay it on the line. Look him in the eye and tell him I love him. If he doesn't respond or ignores me etc etc, I will know he is not man enough for what I want.
I am also going to tell him that this is it.... meaning I'm ending it for good if he doesn't give me what i need, deserve and have been waiting for for over 4 years. That is not for him to leave his wife, but to be there for me as much as he can and tell me he loves me. its important to us women.
SA
What you two do share is as good as it gets! You're both getting the maximum. Only his divorce or separation can improve it now.
Secretia
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